I actually had an epiphany the other day on my twelve hour drive across the prairies.
So I used to feel really sorry for myself that I don’t have the same kind of relationship with my now in-laws as I had with my ex in-laws.
My ex in-laws are fabulous people. I got along so well with them and even called them mom and dad. They were/are amazing and involved grandparents.
I used to say they were my favourite thing about my ex, even while I was married to him.
Whenever I was in their presence I felt so safe, secure, comfortable, loved and accepted.
But once I left my husband, my relationship with them ceased. It was heartbreaking.
My now in-laws are also salt of the earth kind of people and very nice to me.
I’m not that close with them however, and definitely can’t see ever calling them mom and dad. I really don’t feel that they’re very interested in my life.
Because of the loss of that tight bond with my ex in-laws, which was never replaced by my now in-laws, I would get hung up on that at times and feel like it was a real loss. I let it make me feel sad.
However.
I came to the conclusion finally, after nearly eleven years of pitying myself, that it’s much better to like and love the partner I’m with than love his parents to death.
I might not have in-laws who really feel like a second set of parents but that’s not really a reason to stay married to someone.
It’s better to have a really great partner and an okay relationship with his parents than a crappy partner who has amazing parents.
Right?
bloom.planted.north 
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