I drove nearly four hours each way on the Thursday before Good Friday to meet with a lawyer. The only lawyer I could find who was willing to take me on as a client. There were only a handful of lawyers in my town and I’d met with each to explain what I needed done. They’d all closed their doors on me.
My mission was simple. Have my name taken off of the title of what was now HIS house and then have all of the parenting and money negotiations that we did through mediation, signed off.
A simple separation. No child support, no alimony. No payments to anyone.
He keeps the house, garage and contents. Also the cabin at the lake, the boat and the four wheeler. He keeps his pension and I keep mine. The only thing I asked for was my half of the equity into the house we bought together, in both our names in 2001 and had lived in for twelve years at that point.
As I sat across her desk she leaned back in her chair and asked “are you sure about this?” To which I replied, absolutely.
“Are you of sound mind?” I think so.
“Is anyone coercing you into this?” Nope.
I was extremely anxious to have this all signed and done so that I could move on and buy my very own house for the kids and I. Apartment living with three kids was not super convenient.
She said, “I’m going to need a glass of wine or two when I go home today”. I didn’t understand what the big deal was but she explained that when a marriage ends, everything is to be divided fairly. Equally. She said her stomach felt queasy agreeing to this. He gets pretty much everything, I start over with, compared to him, peanuts.
At one point she stepped out of the office to go over everything with one of the senior lawyers at the firm. I heard him raising his voice, he sounded angry. I was worried he would direct her to refuse to do it.
In the end, I paid her five hundred dollars and drove the four hours home smiling and singing, thinking about having overcome that hurdle.
What’s mine was mine, what’s his was his and I could start house hunting.
This was nearly twelve years ago but when I ponder Easter weekends, this one stands out in my mind.
bloom.planted.north 
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